Say one for me….

It often happens to me, I get into a conversation with someone in a shop or out on the street and they tell me their troubles and as we prepare to take our leave of each other they often ask, ‘Say one for me, won’t you.’

What are they talking about? They’re talking about prayer. In spite of the dramatic reduction in numbers of folks attending church, a recent study found that 6 out of 7 people still believe that prayers can be answered. And, surprisingly, it’s the young who are more inclined to pray than the older generation. Just over half of all adults in the UK pray, and just under half of those who pray said they believed God hears their prayers. Four out of ten go further, saying prayer changes the world.

So what are people praying about and when do we do it? For those who would not profess to have a faith, it is an instinctive response to a crisis: “Please, God.” Personal crisis or tragedy is the most common reason for praying, with one in four saying they pray to gain comfort or feel less lonely. When not in a crisis, praying for our family tops the list of subjects of prayers at 71%, followed by thanking God (42%), praying for healing (40%) and for friends (40%).

“We should not be surprised by these recent findings,” says Rachel Treweek, bishop of Gloucester, because prayer, “reflects human longing for the mystery and love of God amid experiences of daily life.”

And apparently prayer is good for you. A study conducted by Lisa Miller, professor and director of Clinical Psychology and director of the Spirituality Mind Body Institute at Teachers College, Columbia University, found that people who pray regularly had a changed physiological structure to their brains; they had thicker cortices. The thinning of the cortice, especially in certain areas of the brain is an indicator of impending ill health, particularly due to depression. Thicker cortices indicated a lesser chance of suffering from depression, suggesting that prayer and spirituality really does yield some stunning benefits to the human brain. Other benefits have also emerged including strengthening our resistance to stress, depression and anxiety, building resilience in everyday challenges, improved recovery rates after physical illness, a healthier heart and a greater sense of well-being.

So what is prayer? According to Isabelle Hamley, chaplain to the archbishop of Canterbury, prayer is “primarily a line of communication with God – thinking, reflecting, bringing one’s concerns and worries into a bigger picture.”

Prayer is a mysterious thing but time and again, I hear folks saying that they know instinctively that something is happening when they pray….maybe that is why I am asked to pray for those I meet so often.

This is how Padraig O’Tuoma describes prayer:

“Prayer is a cry…prayer is a small fire lit to keep cold hands warm. Prayer is a practice that flourishes with faith and doubt. Prayer is asking and prayer is sitting. Prayer can be a rhythm that helps us make sense in times of senselessness, not offering solutions, always, but speaking to and from the mystery of humanity…’

To pray is to imagine and in imagining, we may reach something that is bigger than our imaginings, a wideness, an embrace in which we and all for whom we have prayed are held.

From the 30th May to the 9th June, (10-3pm every day apart from Mondays) we are opening a prayer room in St Paul’s Church Frizington. We are inviting you all to come and be; you can just sit and take in the silence or spend some time listening, wondering, and expressing your deepest longings. The choice is yours. Let us pray.

Ó Tuama, P., Corrymeela Community, 2017. Daily prayer with the Corrymeela Community.

Link to research on prayer survey

Tearfund – Prayer Survey

Link to research findings on prayer makes us healthier



Living the Questions

I once heard a philosopher say that questions are far more interesting than answers. It was an unusual remark that challenged me to reflect that I had spent much of my life seeking for answers and far less time thinking about crafting the right questions; questions that would open up new ways of looking at the world, questions that would challenge me and the way I was choosing to live; questions that would open up new avenues to explore.

During the season of Lent, church leaders from our county set off on a walking pilgrimage, visiting each Mission Community in the area. A Mission Community is an ecumenical group of churches within a specified area, who have agreed to work together to encourage and support the growth of local disciples, and be outward looking, seeking to serve and bless the communities in which they are located.

Bishop James, Bishop Emma and Sarah Moore (Leader of the United Reformed Church in Cumbria) visited our Parish and took part in an event on the 3rd April at Cleator Moor Methodist Church, entitled ‘Q & A’ Questions and Afters. They were asked questions about their life and faith and vision by folks across the churches in our Mission Community. Some of the most searching questions came from the children in our schools.

Year 2 children asked: How did God make the world?  Why did Jesus die on a cross and did Jesus come back to life?

Year 3 and 4 children asked: Who created God and how? Why do we have a God? Why does war happen?

Year 5 children asked: If God was not here what would happen?

Year 6 children asked: Why did God give us illness and the ability to die?

I found it so encouraging that the children in our schools are thinking deeply about a whole range of  significant issues such as: Who is God? What is God like? Does faith in God affect the way we live our lives and relate to each other?

It seems to me that as we grow older, we lose our ability to question. Questions and the uncertainty that accompanies them can make us feel uncomfortable and unsure.  We want to be able to offer answers and solutions. But what if answers aren’t the answer?

The poet Rainer Maria Rilke ( 1875–1926) once wrote about the importance of questions in a letter to a young protégé :

“I want to beg you, as much as I can, dear sir, to be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.”

Throughout his time on earth, Jesus preferred asking questions than giving answers; 135 questions to be exact! And the answers he provided often required the questioners to do some further work. Jesus was the master story teller and he much preferred this medium than proffering neat, cut and dried answers. Like Father, like Son! In the first book in the Bible, we find God asking us questions; questions that are as timely and relevant today as they were when they were first written down;

Where are you? Where is your brother/ sister? Later in the Bible, Jesus asks those who were his closest friends: What are you looking for? What do you desire? Who do you say I am?

What would it look like if you were to live into these questions? What might you discover about God, yourself and your neighbour?


Having a laugh!

I recently came across a list of the top ten blunders made in parish magazines and service booklets. The typos, which were often just the omission of one letter, changed the whole meaning of the sentence that followed. Instead of ‘Lord graciously hear us …’ we had ‘Lord, graciously heat us …’. Given this cold winter, and the temperature in some of our churches, this is perhaps a completely understandable plea but possibly not an intentional one!

And then there was the petition for Christ to ‘destroy all the woks of the evil one ….’ Yes, that seems very appropriate in this day and age … you never know how a wok can be used for ill effect.

And in some churches, things were clearly getting desperate. In one service booklet there was an invitation to ‘be gin with prayer…’ And an Ash Wednesday service order which read…’Remember you are butt dust and into dust you shall return….’

The list caused some laughter in our house and it got me wondering about what makes us laugh. Researchers tell us that things we find funny fall into three categories…those things that seem unusual and a bit incongruous; things that make us feel superior; and finally, we often we laugh as a release valve when things are getting tense. I’m sure you will have experienced stressful situations when all of a sudden everyone is rolling around on the floor laughing…often at nothing particularly funny but the laughter helps to release the building tension.

Given the reasons why we laugh it should not surprise us to find examples of humour throughout the Bible. Sometimes we find the Bible poking fun at us, our mistakes and weaknesses, our foibles, sometimes we find humour used in the Bible to relieve mounting tension and sometimes it is just the plain unusual and unexpected that makes us smile.

Thinking of the way that humour is often created by the incongruous, the unexpected, how humour helps us sometimes to feel superior, I recall a letter written in the Bible to a church who were struggling to ‘get’ Jesus. At times it seemed to them that the way Jesus behaved was, in the eyes of the world, somewhat foolish. They possibly felt that the choices he made were unexpected, incongruous, somewhat naïve and it seems that they were feeling a bit superior.

And maybe they have a point for instead of courting worldly power and influence Jesus hangs out with eccentric religious fundamentalists like John the Baptist and goes out to dinner with tax collectors, terrorists, and a rag tag bunch of folks who were never going to have much clout.

Rather than avoiding trouble, Jesus goes out of his way to stir up controversy; engaging in debates with the upper classes and the well to do. He has no survival instinct, instead decides to go to Jerusalem in the last few days of his life, knowing that this was where all his enemies were hanging out, all those who had threatened his very life. And far from slipping in a side door, he makes a real song and dance out of his arrival, riding on the back of a donkey, surrounded by crowds cheering and shouting encouragement.

And then, instead of building positively on his moment in the limelight, he antagonises the very folks who were sympathetic to his cause, by creating a big scene in the courts of the Temple, the place revered by the Jews, and in so doing he makes enemies of all the Jewish Leaders.

I guess we could predict that it’s not going to turn out well and sure enough, Jesus is condemned to death on a cross. But it doesn’t end there. For when God raises him from the dead, Jesus carries on much as he did before, trusting a woman and a group of grief crazed followers to get the message out that Jesus had been raised from the dead.

But the letter writer in the Bible flips the whole thing on its head when he writes, don’t dismiss Jesus as foolish for ‘the foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than human strength’. Somehow or other, Jesus has proved to be wiser than all the councils of humanity; his foolhardy actions have been world changing. And he calls us to follow in his footsteps….

God ask us to embark on the folly of trusting that there are things that are more important than money, power and influence. That our reputation with an unseen God matters more than our reputation with people we can see and hear. He asks that we are foolish enough to believe that we can be rich though we are poor, that we gain most when we give the most away. Foolish enough to think that our testimony will change the world more than politics and power. Foolish enough to live by the high standard he calls us to, stubbornly uncompromising, rather than going with the flow of the world around us when it would make life so much easier for all concerned. And foolish enough to live in the hope that the best is yet to be, when so many around us tell us it is not true.

So this Easter, with a smile on our faces, and laughter lightening our hearts, let us celebrate the way of Jesus…it might look foolish to some but it is and continues to be world changing and life transforming.


Finding a place at the table

My mother in law loved to feed people. On a Sunday, after the family had eaten lunch you would go in to her kitchen to help with the washing up and there, lined up on the work surface would be various meals left over, plated up. ‘That one’s for Edna down the road and that one’s for old Mr Burns,’ she would say if you looked enquiringly at the row of plates. Everyone was fed; neighbours, relatives, people serving the community. Each week she would be up at the crack of dawn making bacon butties for the Bin Men. Pat had a finely tuned sense of hospitality. She knew that something important happened when people shared a meal.

Meals bring people together…From confidences shared over a simple cup of tea to elaborate dinners celebrating the important landmarks of our lives …. Christening parties, birthdays, weddings, funeral wakes; meals form community, they are at the heart of our hospitality, they are sacramental encounters …. In sharing the basic necessities of life we realise afresh our common humanity. So, it’s no surprise that we find meals playing an important part in Jesus’s ministry whether that be providing a breakfast picnic on the beach for his friends, organising an impromptu feeding of a surprisingly large group of people on a mountain side, or accepting an invitation to take tea with the local dignitary and the local ne’er do well. Jesus lived out his message of radical welcome and hospitality. He gave time to people, all sorts of people, and in the conversation that flowed back and forth across the table, Jesus made friendships, deepened and strengthened community. So what messages might we learn from the example he sets us?

We learn the importance of making time for each other. Relationships are built and strengthened as we give our attention to one another. We learn that we all have needs, needs for the basics like food but also for friendship, for connection with others, or belonging to something bigger. We also realise that at the heart of relationship is reciprocity, we each have something to give and to receive; we are bound together by these chords of human kindness.

This Lent we are going to be meeting each week to reflect on the stories of those who were at table with Jesus. Do consider coming along so together we can continue to establish friendships and strengthen our community. May we learn together how we can continue to follow in Jesus’s footsteps, being hospitable to those around us, standing alongside those who are in need, breaking down barriers of difference. So, do come and find a place at the table.


Smile at your New Year Resolution Failures!

This was the title of an article I read this week which caught my attention. I guess like me, you are probably wishing that you hadn’t taken on so many new resolutions for the year ahead. The reality of walking 10,000 steps every day is overcoming my resolve to exercise regularly. Maybe, like me, you have already resigned yourself to failure!

But take heart because it seems we are all in the same boat … and its an experience that has been common to humanity in all ages. Right back in the days of the early Church, a follower of Jesus called Paul spoke of his frustration that he always seemed to end up doing the very thing he told himself not to do!

So, what’s the solution? Do we just give up and never try? Paul showed us a different way that doesn’t involve beating ourselves up for our inevitable failures and weaknesses. He encourages us to stop worrying about ourselves. Instead, he counsels, accept your weaknesses and allow those weaknesses to propel you to rely every more fully on the God who knows us and forgives us and who is in the business of restoring us so that we become the people he created us to be.

I recall reading a poem by Dorothy Law Nolte that was displayed in a school classroom. I’m sure you have come across it before. These are just a few of its lines ….

If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn ….
If children live with acceptance, they learn to love ….
If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves ….

As with children so it is with us. If we live with love we learn to love, not just ourselves but all those we meet. We may not know or be fully aware, but we are living lives surrounded and indwelt by the unconditional love of God. A God who invites us to lift our heads and receive God’s love and allow God to guide, encourage, accept and strengthen us from within so that we become God’s people full of love and joy and hope.